Chatter around the Place of Toil and Labor’s imaginary water cooler shifted away from American Idol and to the movie The Wiz.

Michael: Maybe we could work Sanjaya Malakar into the Michael Jackson role and rekindle the old Diana Ross/Michael Jackson relationship thing.
Tiffany: That would be scary.
Michael: We could re-do The Wiz.
Tiffany: (laughs)
Michael: Hey, what role did Michael Jackson play in The Wiz?
Tiffany: He was the Strawman, I think.
Desireé (from behind her cube wall): Strawman!
Michael: I’ll check IMDB.

type type type

Michael: Yup, Strawman. Hey, I didn’t know Richard Pryor was in The Wiz!
Tom: He was the token black man.

…pregnant pause…

Michael: Um…dude, everyone in The Wiz was black!
Tiffany: Everyone!
Tom: I know, I know, I’m just making a joke and failing as usual.

Bernard (quietly and from far away): Not everyone in The Wiz was black.

Tiffany: Yes they were!
Michael: Wha-a-a-t?
Tiffany: Who in The Wiz wasn’t black?
Desireé: Yeah, who in The Wiz wasn’t black?

Bernard (prairie dogging out of his cube): Michael Jackson was in The Wiz.

—–

I’ve insulted Jeff and doubtless will have to buy him copious amounts of pale ale to attain forgiveness:

Jeff: Sorry Michael, but you can’t get me to read about American Idol on your blog by either:

1. Mentioning me
or
2. Mentioning Galactus

Won’t happen.

Michael: What if I work in beer, The Clash and some DC characters?

Jeff: Nope, not even beer and punk rock can make me care about washed up R&B singers and the fake, scripted competition of maudlin amateur wannabes. And DC comics? C’mon, was that an insult?

* I blame Aquaman, the worst super hero in the DC Comics universe, for Jeff’s feeling insulted. No one respects a super hero in green tights with no powers other than the ability to get dolphins and porpoises to do the heavy lifting for him while he hangs out in the underwater lair of Stupidia smoking hookahs with the Queen of the Sea Monkeys.

Maybe I should have specified the Green Lantern. Maybe then it would have been all right.

—–

P.S. “Somalia got my toaster just the other day” is a lyric from “Here We Go Again” by Stakka Bo - one of the oddball tunes I picked up while migrating across Europe many ages ago. It happened to be playing when I wrote this post.

Legal Disclaimer: Stakka Bo is in no way affiliated with, nor endorses, DC Comics (especially Aquaman).